I'm feeling good, real good, lately. I knew from experience that taking weight off is a physical relief. Things are easier when you are at a healthier weight. There is, however, a toll to pay on your psyche when you are over weight. For me I lost some of the confidence that is a big part of who I have always been. I have never been a slim or petit girl and I have known since I was a child that I never would be based on my natural bone structure and build. I am completely fine with being a big, tall girl hovering in the plus sizes, not everyone can or would want to be a size 4 and not everyone can pull off a size 14-16. It wasn't until my weight over powered my ability to control it that it started to impact the core of my personality....causing self doubt, shyness and insecurity. I am not shy, I am not insecure....I have self doubt from time to time but not at the scale I was having to deal with it. I was constantly telling myself "you can't lose this weight, you just can't". I changed my walk and my stance to try to cover up my flaws. I never took pictures of myself and actually ripped up pictures I couldn't stand to see of myself. I felt out of control and that left me frustrated, miserable and bitchy. The happy-go-lucky girl I like to think I was was quickly replaced with a mean and grouchy eating machine.
Then the weight started to come off....pound by pound my mood changed, my stance straightened up, my gait became faster and more confident. I felt comfortable in my skin again and that is liberating, comforting...exciting.
I assume that anyone who ventures into their own weight loss journey will expect some dramatic changes both inside and out, this is part of the fun and the incentive to stay on track. This is my experience to date with the mental effects of weight on my personality. I anticipate more dramatic changes ahead for me as I begin breaking through weight barriers I haven't even been close to breaking since I was a teenager. I am not sure how I will transform when I reach my ideal body weight (notice the WHEN and not if...that's something new). I know for certain that it will only be good, it can only be good, or great or fantastic...any positive descriptive word applies here. It is this weightless joy that seems to be refueling my fire to keep me on track.
Then the weight started to come off....pound by pound my mood changed, my stance straightened up, my gait became faster and more confident. I felt comfortable in my skin again and that is liberating, comforting...exciting.
I assume that anyone who ventures into their own weight loss journey will expect some dramatic changes both inside and out, this is part of the fun and the incentive to stay on track. This is my experience to date with the mental effects of weight on my personality. I anticipate more dramatic changes ahead for me as I begin breaking through weight barriers I haven't even been close to breaking since I was a teenager. I am not sure how I will transform when I reach my ideal body weight (notice the WHEN and not if...that's something new). I know for certain that it will only be good, it can only be good, or great or fantastic...any positive descriptive word applies here. It is this weightless joy that seems to be refueling my fire to keep me on track.
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